Pasha Kincai's Birth Story

Pasha describes in her own words how her births were “true joy” and totally pain-free using the Jeyarani Method. Pasha had waterbirths.I have now given birth twice in my life and on both occasions I have felt the most blissful feelings.Birth for me has been about:

  • Unity with all that is

  • Giving fully

  • Opening, widening

  • Expansion

  • Trusting

  • Transforming fear to love

  • Loving

  • Believing

  • Pushing Out

  • Totality of being

  • Connection with all that is

  • The most wondrous beautiful feelings

“Oh, you must be one of those women that have child-bearing hips or something!” say many women to me.“No” – I say with absolute conviction. In fact many a practitioner has told me how small my pelvis is and how stiff my sacroiliac and hip joints are having suffered osteoarthritis and various affecting accidents. The other day I was told that I have one of the tightest perineums and vaginal muscles that a very experienced birth practitioner had ever examined.So what enabled me to have these blissful feelings?PREPARATION, PREPARATION AND MORE PREPARATION.With my first child I knew I would have one of those screaming, freaked out, fearful, cursing, laboured births if I did not do something about it.By chance and pure magic I arrived at the hands of Dr. Gowri Motha and her natural birthing methods.She prescribed reflexology, massage, swimming, yoga and a series of self-hypnosis classes to prepare for a liberating birth as well as the optional waterbirth, which is known to really aid women in pain relief and to give the baby a much more gentle entry into the world. I went for weekly reflexology, did very little swimming, no yoga and followed the self-hypnosis all the way through along with my partner.It was a Sunday morning when I awoke with the knowledge that Maya – my firstborn daughter was coming. It was this wonderful sensation of just knowing. Filled with joy I paced around the house beaming, “My baby is coming”. I began to sing, smile and cuddle everybody. I was so happy.I called Gowri and she came over at about 11am. She examined me – I was 3cm dilated and purring like a fat, happy cat. Gowri talked me through a relaxation process helping me to access the knowledge that I was safe and well, that my body knew exactly what to do, that I would just be opening, slowly and gently ready to give birth at the hospital that afternoon.Kofi, my husband, went ahead and prepared the birthing pool at the hospital. When I was about 5/6cm dilated, we went in the car to the hospital. I remember pacing around on all fours feeling like a panda in the back of the car – seeing all these mad bring lights and thinking how funny the world was. I felt very primal and instinctively knew that there were not meant to be all of these streetlights around in the world and that there was no real need for me to be going to hospital other than the fact that my birthing pool awaited me there.Arriving at the hospital, my midwife examined me – “How dilated do you think you are?” she asked. I told her perhaps 6cm or so. She laughed at me and said she would be very surprised – that I looked far too relaxed to be that far dilated!Well,  to her surprise,  I was 9cm dilated and feeling wonderful. I remember walking across the hall to the toilet and hearing all of these women groaning and shouting as if in agony. I went to Gowri and told her that I must go to them and tell them it’s okay and not to worry.The hypnosis sessions with Gowri had fully attuned me to the knowledge that women all around the world are able to give birth and intuitively know exactly what to do. That is why birth can be a safe, natural and very joyous experience.My first daughter was born within eight hours – she was an extremely relaxed baby – only crying when hungry, or on a few occasions she was unwell. Most of her first months were spent arms spread out, palms up, completely relaxed, open and trusting in everything – like an Angel just landed on a fluffy white cloud. No screams, moans, agitation, grizzles, gripes, cramps, fidgets or cries. I feel sure that this was due to such a peaceful entry to the world.I gave birth to my second child, Joy, five years later. The contractions started at 8am on the day that Maya was due to start school. I stood on the playground smiling and waving at her whilst these powerful waves were pulsing through my body. I got home, went to my bedroom and prowled around the bed and then like a cat I pawed the mattress and rolled around as each contraction came and went. I called Gowri while my husband prepared the pool in the house and the midwives came. Again it was a truly wonderful experience but this time even faster with a precision second stage.In the birthing pool,  I was rolling around like a dolphin and I had visions of a whale splashing its huge tail into the water. I felt fully energised and yet I totally relaxed between each contraction with Gowri’s gentle encouragement and her wonderful smile. I felt in totally in tune with Gowri and trusted her completely; she was my link, guide and guardian through the birth. Through a mixture of eye contact and telepathy we connected and she would say exactly what I needed to hear at that moment: “Beautiful Pasha, you are doing beautifully – now relax and let go – well done”. “Your baby is coming now”. Gowri’s assistant was sending me Reiki – beaming from a distance like an Angel as Joy arrived. Four women stood over me like a church choir or a flock of Angels just saying, “That’s it,  Pasha,  just two more big pushes now – when you’re ready”. The last two pushes were very focused; one for the head, one for the shoulders. Then I was there relaxing, cuddling my new-born. The birth was full of ease and wonderment. Half an hour later I stood up and coughed and completely let go of the placenta. Wonderful. I was left with the feeling that I can’t wait to have another one!Gowri held a very understated presence – letting me get on with it. I trusted her and she trusted me.Pasha KincaiMORE STORIES